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The Weight Of The World On A New Father

by August 4, 2012 0 comments

I know this is way off topic but it’s the reason things have been slow here at The Fourth Turn this week and a proud father of a newborn I can’t help myself.  It will be the only one, I promise.

Last night was the first night at home for our newest addition to the family. Christopher Jensen or Jensen as he will be called was born on Wednesday and came home yesterday after lunch. Now I’m not a “new” new father, we already have 2 sons but I wasn’t apart of their life until they were about 2 and 3. They are soon to turn 5 and 6, they now carry my last name and as far as I and anyone else are concerned they are my sons. However this is my first experience with a newborn and that changes the game quite a bit.

Sometime in the evening as I walked around the yard, letting the dog get some exercise and checking the mail, the weight of the world came to rest fully on my shoulders. No more hospital with round the clock staff who’s sole purpose is to make sure your wife and your baby are safe and healthy. It’s all on you now. If something happens you are going to have to get them to medical help, which for me is 10 mins away. You have to make sure that no physical harm comes to them, you can’t rely on hospital security anymore. You even have to make sure that the dog and the other kids in the house behave themselves.

Mom now has a new priority. That baby is completely dependent on the 2 of you for everything. As her focus shifts to the baby you have to take up the slack in all the other areas. Not to mention the fact that she just had a baby and now her body needs some time to recover. There are a thousand things that need to be done. Things that you never even dreamed up in the run up to the delivery. Everyone of those things suddenly disappear when the baby cries and then reappear when he is quite again.

For the next 4 to 6 weeks your whole world will be your family. If you are fortunate as I am to have an employer who understands and will allow you to take the time off please do it. I can’t help but think that the opportunity for bonding will never be as great is it’s going to be in that time. Your family will never need you more than in this stage of finding a new balance to your world.

As the Dad you become the linchpin, the one that has to hold it all together. You have to run interference for your wife and the baby with the dozens of people who will want to come and visit. You will be the public face of the family and you will be the one everyone in the household will look to when they need sometime. You are now the peacemaker, cook, janitor, counselor, maintenance man….etc. The entire weight of the world has just been laid on your shoulders. But have no fear, just as the billions and billions of fathers have done since the beginning of time you will step up and bear it. You have to, you have no choice, you are A Dad.

-Courtesy The Dads Place 

Christopher Neal
Christopher is a happily married father of 3 very active boys. He is a full time law enforcement officer and part time web designer. Chris is currently the chief editor of TheFourthTurn.com as well as has personal blog TheDadsPlace.com

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